Today is one of those days that I rarely get anymore–it’s one of those Sundays where I got to sleep in (till 10AM), exercise and refocus my energy through yoga, and spend the rest of the day from sun-up to sundown fasting, praying, praising God, and spending quality time with Him in that little prayer closet that Jesus talked about in Matthew’s Gospel when He told us how we should pray.

I am usually a very faithful church goer–have been ever since I was a child. My family is deeply rooted and immersed in the church (my brother is a minister of the gospel) and I believe that it is important for us to be gathered weekly with other Saints and Believers so that we can “recharge” our spiritual battery so to speak. But lately, I have been feeling a bit “empty” when I go to church–I have been praying through this and seeking wise counsel on the matter.

When we feel this way–it is important to STOP-PRAY and evaluate so that we can get back on the right track. Some of it is very natural–meaning whenever you have been in a long term relationship of value (I was Baptized and added to the church Acts 2:35-39 at age 12–30 years ago this August) it can get “stale” if you don’t keep it alive and new. So that is my goal in 2009–to rekindle the love and passion I once felt when I was a younger Christian.

I used to be terrified of missing church because I was taught that to do so was a “punishable offense” by God himself. I don’t believe that anymore. My body is my Temple and it needed rest today. It needed/I needed some quiet time with the phone ringer on OFF–the TV off–and just time to gather my thoughts, and quiet my spirit with God by my side.

Lately, I have been really rethinking my relationship with God as well as with my fellow “Christians”. I don’t want to become the kind of Christian who goes to church faithfully each Sunday, attends midweek Bible class, and knows the scripture backward and forward only to have a heart of Stone. I yearn for my “first love” (e.g., God) and to be close to Him as I once was as a young child and into my teens.

I think I am going to start “date day” with God and me once every week now. Where we have a day to talk to one another, refresh our relationship, fellowship together, and build our friendship. That does not mean that I will not be in church faithfully, I will. But, I need more from God. I seek more from my relationship with other Christians. I need a special time set-aside that belongs to God and Him only. I crave fellowship and true Christian love from the body of Christ–sadly, we all fall woefully inadequate in this area because we are all too BUSY and Overwhelmed in our own lives to care about others the way the Bible commands that we do so.

We all could use “date night/day” with God–don’t you think? We are all so busy–so noisy-so hurried–so worn that God gets what is left from us. Does that even sound right to you?

I opened my journal on the train home from New York yesterday and realized that I had not made an entry since before the Inauguration on January 20th. I just haven’t had time. That will not happen again. I am going to catch up on some reading today–I’m actually going to read the Sunday paper today–something I have not done in months.

My life is really going in a great direction right now on all fronts. God is solely responsible for the joy, success, and blessings that I feel now. He has never forsaken me–even when I have walked away from Him. I owe Him more than the “expected”–”routine”–”lukewarm” worship that we all give to Him–far too often.

I owe Him, what I continually seek from Him: Love, Adoration, Faithfulness, and Intimacy.

Today I had a Sunday Kind of Love and it lifted me, strengthened me, and rested my soul.

If I Have Not Love, I Am Nothing

Sophia